Easier to love from a distance?

I'm easier to love from a distance, at least that is what my husband told me tonight. We did not have a very good night together tonight. I was grumpy and he was on one of his "we are spending too much money" kicks.

To fully understand our evening you would have to know that we have been talking about buying a solar pool heater for about a month now. I have spent countless hours on-line researching these heaters. Trying to figure out which one to get, what will work best for our situation and trying to find the most economical one to buy. We have an above ground pool and not much sun on the pool itself during the day.

So "my plan" is to go and buy one and get it installed this weekend on the roof of the garage. This however is not exactly my husbands plan. He doesn't think we have researched it enough and that there is no rush in getting it done. He can't understand why I m pushing for this weekend. After I explain that next weekend is Memorial Day weekend and this weekend the weather is going to cooperate with the installation he seems to be better, but still not 100% on board.

He questions what my "next" crusade will be after the heater is installed. He accused me of never being satisfied, and not treating him very good if I don't get what I want. Hmmmm, I have spent sometime thinking about this over the weekend and I don't see it the same way as he does. I am very satisfied, I am just trying to improve things around the house and yard to make it nicer. I mention buying some patio blocks or stepping stones to create a walkway from the driveway to the backyard (6 to 10 feet at most) and I get a 10 minute lecture on the price of gas and how much it is going to cost to heat our house next winter. He says we should be putting all of our money into savings so we can afford heat in the fall.

I am not a big shopper or spender. I'm not saying that I don't ever go shopping or spend money, because I do. I am careful with the money we earn and I don't see myself as wasteful.

This is not a new argument or discussion around here. I should be getting used to it. But all in one night to be told that your are easier to love from a distance, that your greedy and never satisfied, and that you treat your husband badly when you don't get what you want is hard to hear. I was awake most of Friday night thinking about the things he said and I wonder...

Can I ever please him? Is he right about me? What can I do to change my behavior? Or is he just a pain in the ass?

It was a tough night, but the weekend got better and the solar heater is installed on the roof of the garage. All of the fittings are good and nothing is leaking!!! Which is a very good thing.

Now for my next "crusade"... I'm not sure yet but I'll let you know as soon as I figure it out.